Have you seen my baseball?

Since I've been here for 3 months and haven't worked out once...and since I haven't been to a gym in almost a year anyway, I figured it was time to get back after it.  I did actually go through with it and join the gym across the street.  My first day, Saturday, I threw on some work out clothes and headed over.  I met with a girl (also named Kat, much to the confusion of the girl who worked the front desk) and she basically said ok, well you can go ahead and do a work out and then come back down here and meet me and we'll get you all signed up.  Great.  I hit the treadmill and a few machines.  As I am suffering through some sort of arm machine where I can only manage about 10 lbs (but are they pounds?  or kilos?) I look around at the other people around me.  I quickly realize that I am the only girl in shorts (also the only girl wearing a shirt that said "Lock it up! Kristen's Bachelorette Party", but that's because there are only 8 other girls who are cool enough to rock that shirt).  There were guys wearing shorts, girls wearing sweatpants and spandex that go below their knees, but no girls in shorts.  I start to have a minor panic attack.  Am I breaking the rules?  Maybe England is so conservative that girls can't wear shorts?  Then I realize that Kat would have told me "you silly American, you can't wear that!".  So I finish my workout, go downstairs, sign up and head out to a boozey lunch-turned-night-out with Allison.

Day 2 at the gym...another minor incident.  So I do my whole workout and then head into the locker room because I realize that I have no idea what kind of damage I've done to my body over Christmas, into New Years, and then drinking all this heavy beer.  Not wanting to have a repeat of the post-Belgium weight, I decide to get on the scale.  So I hop on and look down.  I see kilos and stones.  Hmm... well this is interesting.  I head out to the front desk and ask the woman "Do you know how many kilos are in a lb?"  "Umm..no, but hold on a sec".  She gets on the phone and calls someone down to help us out.  Then someone (guy) who was wandering by and heard my questions said "isn't it 14?" I said, good lord I hope not.. I think that's stones.  So the guy she calls comes and he has no idea.  Then they see someone else who works there walking by and flag him down.  He comes over with 4 of his friends (two who are not employees) and they all start discussing it.  It was like that scene in There's Something About Mary when he gets his fly stuck and the whole town stops by the check it out.  Finally someone pulls out an iPhone and we all gather round.  But he's not looking up a conversion, he's got a converter in his phone.  Awesome.  "Ok so how many kilos are you?" By this point all the guys who have gathered around are really interested in the answer because we have spend so much time gathering the whole gym around me.  So I mutter what I saw on the scale and he plugs it in.  "So do you want metric pounds or US pounds?" 

"Um...is there a difference?  I would like the answer in American please!" 

"Ok...you weight ___" 

"OK TERRIFIC BYE!!"  and I run out of the gym (proud of myself) but still completely embarrassed.  

I took yesterday off (I don't want to completely wear myself out) but will be back in there today, avoiding eye contact with everyone at all costs.