Ok that weekend TamJam had their going away party. They moved to Hong Kong a week ago. The going away party was on a docked boat on the River Thames. The boat happened to be owned by the royal family of Qatar or something....those guys that just bought Harrods. Yes, stuff like this only happens when TamJam are around. Anyway, it was a very fun time. Afterwards, me and 5 others decided to keep it classy and head to the Walkabout (spoiler - NOT CLASSY AT ALL!). It was a good time, lots of dancing, lots of singing.
Then, I went to a place called Newcastle. V's boyfriend is from up there, and he was having his birthday party back there. He invited her, but since they've only been dating for like 2 minutes, she asked if I would want to come. We went up Saturday morning and were just staying the night. I originally thought that Newcastle was like 2 1/2 hours away. Not so much. It's actually 5 hours away. Who knew the UK was that big? Not this girl. So anyway, we drive up, and on the way up, V basically warns me that I might not be able to understand anyone because they have such strong accents. Awesome.
We get up there, check into the hotel, get changed, and then go to meet up with Pete and his friends. They were in a pub. V and I were dressed for the night (it was like 4 pm at this point). So we walk into a room where there are 15 boys sitting around a table drinking beer. All eyes turn to us when we walk in. So Pete introduces us to everyone. They had been drinking since 2, so were just starting to get to a point where they chatty. They were not there yet though. So we sit there for like one drink and then all head over to the next bar. As we are walking over some of the boys start talking to us and asking who we are, where we're from, etc. Since I was still sober, and there was no background noise, if they spoke slowly (which they clearly had all been told to do) I could pretty much make out what they were saying.
At the next bar, I was talking to one of the boys who they called "Geordie". This was confusing to me because boys that are from the north of the UK are called Geordies. And his nickname was Geordie. But they were all technically Geordies. Strange. He told me that basically there are a few words I need to know and I'll be ok:
1) why-aye - yes of course
2) cannie - like the way boston people use "wicked"
3) alreecht - much like "you alright?" or "how are you" in american
4) howay - come on, come here
Anyway, Geordie and I were talking and Pete came up - probably just to check in and make sure I wasn't struggling. Another one of Pete's friends, who may or may not have been a midget, came up to me and starting saying things I didn't understand. Pete told him to slow down. The midget then looked at Pete and said something, and Pete said, "no, it's ok, don't worry, Kat totally gets sarcasm". The midget then proceeded to tell me a joke that was not funny or sarcastic.
Ok seriously, I don't know who is spreading this lie that Americans don't get sarcasm, but it needs to stop.
Anywhoo....we left that bar and went to another one, then ended up at the last place where we would spend most of the night dancing. We walked in (ps all of the guys are ROCKED by this point) and the area we were in was playing 90s music. HALLELUJAH!!! I was so happy. Finally a bar with music I LOVE. We sit down in these big booths (oh yeah and Pete had three other girl friends who were very nice) and I see all of the guys starting to give me the eyes. Not the good eyes. They are giving me the "I see my target" eyes. I grab V and say, umm let's dance. So I grab her and we hit the dance floor. One song later all the boys had followed. Pete was pretty drunk by this point, so basically was stuck on V like white on rice. At one point I looked around and realized I was surrounded. I would dance, one of the boys would come up and dance with me, then I would spin out. Rinse and repeat x10. I now know what an injured gazelle surrounded by a pack of lions feels like. After every song I would escape to the bar just for a break.
During one of these bar trips, I ran into one of the boys who was not on the dance floor. He offered to buy me a drink, I said yes. Chatted with him for a bit, and then went back to the dance floor. Well an hour or so later, I was standing on the dance floor and that same boy was at the bar. He motioned to me, Drink? I nodded my head. He pointed next to him and said "you have to come here then."
Oh. no. you. didn't.
I stepped off the dance floor and walked over the bar next to him. I said, I'm sorry, I'm not going to understand your response to me because the music is too loud and your accent is too weird, but I don't need you to buy me a drink. Thanks. He said No please I'm sorry. I said, No no, allow me. Now, would you like me to buy you a drink? I'll let you stand wherever you want!
He felt so bad he bought me a shot. HA!
So finally the night ended. I didn't understand what anyone said, but I did get a good feeling about the Newcastleans. Basically it's like you're 30 but you still act like some people did in college: don't wear a jacket - EVER, get insanely sloppy, etc. I even saw some people doing things on the dance floor that were NOT proper dance floor behavior.
V and I got back to the hotel and went to the hotel bar for a debrief of the evening. I learned that I shouldn't speak when we leave London because then people try to talk to you about where you're from and that gets old REAL fast ("Oh you're American? I've been to America!" "Let me guess, Orlando and Vegas" "yeah...how'd you know?" and then the convo is over). For this reason whenever we were in a cab and he asked us where we were going, I would look at V and mouth "you talk!!" I also never thought I would tire of 10 boys battling for my attention; and yet, it happens. All in all, glad I went, happy to never go back again! Onto the next UK city...perhaps Manchester?
The following week several of us headed to Lucky Voice for Glee Kareoke. Yes, this was as awesome as it sounds. Basically we had a private room with two mikes and props. You could sing whatever song you wanted, but they had the whole catalog from Glee. Also with your fee you got a coke (and vanilla vodka) slushee. HOW AWESOME?! Here are some pictures:
(clearly I was singing Livin' on a Prayer - gotta represent)
Then we headed to Bar Soho where, on a Wednesday night, A and I decided we don't take advantage of the fact that we don't need to go home and be a wife enough, so we should stay out late. Great idea on Wednesday night, not a great idea on Thursday morning. Of course, I pushed through and lived to see another day.
America to follow in another post....
1 comment:
Newcastle sounds like the town depicted in "Hot Fuzz". Did you see anyone who looked like Timothy Dalton there??
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